Sami’s Advice Column: Issue Two

Samis+Advice+Column%3A+Issue+Two

Dear Sami,

The people above my dorm room sound like they are scooting furniture around and dropping bowling balls all night. The RA mentioned it to them and it hasn’t stopped. I don’t want to confront them because what if it’s just the Dorland Ghost™ and then they think I’m accusing them of something. 

Anonymous

Hey Anonymous, 

As someone who has had that same exact issue, I think it was a good idea to talk to your RA first. However, since that did not help, I believe the next step you should take is to just walk up there and talk to them. Just asking them about it goes a long way. Though, if you aren’t the most confrontational person a nice note will work as well. Just say hi and tell them that they may be a little too loud, and if they could quiet down, you would appreciate it. Nothing nasty, just something that lets them know that you’re uncomfortable being underneath them when they make so much noise. I’m sure they will understand and will try to do better. However, if they don’t take it so well, then I would ask the RA once again to possibly go with you and mediate the situation. I hope things get better! Also don’t let that ghost scare you, though he/she or they is paranormal, the ghost is very nice. 

Sami 

Dear Sami, 

Me and one of my friends went through a rough patch last year, but she said she wants to move past it and keep being friends. However, she rarely answers my texts and never hits me up to hang out. I don’t feel seen, but I don’t want to abandon her. What should I do?

Anonymous 

Hey Anonymous, 

That situation definitely is a tough one. I’m going to tell you one of my biggest philosophies in life, if someone wanted to do something, they would do it. Here’s the thing when you go through a rough patch with a friend, it takes a toll on both of you, and if you want to repair the friendship, then it takes two. If she doesn’t text you, text her. But if she doesn’t respond or give any effort back, then I think maybe you need to let go of that friendship. It’s hard to keep holding on to something or someone you once thought you’d always have, but at some point you need to start looking at the friendship and ask yourself if it’s more trouble than it’s worth. Some people were meant to be in our lives for a temporary amount of time, even though sometimes we wish so badly it could be permanently. I think you got through a rough patch and worked hard to try to preserve whatever’s left of the friendship, but sometimes pieces of a person and parts of a friendship aren’t enough. You deserve more and so does your friend. Friendship can be work but it should never make you feel like a burden or unseen. So, firstly, before you make any big decisions about this friendship and what to do with it, try talking to your friend and let them know how you feel. Communication is key. I’m so proud of you for trying to keep this friendship alive, but if you decide to let go, please know that is okay too and sometimes you need to let go of someone in order to grow. Do what is best for you and remember, if they want to keep this friendship as much as you do, then they will work on getting back to the place you once were too. 

Sami 

Need some advice or just another voice to settle a dispute! If you want the submission to stay anonymous please say “anon!” All submissions should be submitted to me through this google form. Thanks!